If the boyfriend is told to stay home, maybe he should not be in the lede for a match report.

Carli tells man to stay home

I am trying to recall a story about a men’s team winning the World Cup, or any match, in such spectacular fashion that opens with an anecdote about the MVP telling their girlfriend to stay home. I’m happy to read this kind of thing in a feature, a profile of the player—but in what I understood to be a match report? For a World Cup Final?

This match report appeared in the Guardian; I was lured by the headline “Carli Lloyd shreds Japan.” But I couldn’t get past that intro! Otherwise, the author’s work on the tournament was OK; I just can’t understand that intro. It feels like it was cribbed from Gwen Oxenham’s feature story on Lloyd? (For a good match report, see Grant Wahl’s.)

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